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Relationship Chaos: Men Tend to Focus on Sex & Women Tend to Focus on Love
Men and women are starkly different, yet these two sexes are created to fall in love and even spend their lives together. The topic of understanding one’s partner have been debated for ages; yet, few couples are able to comprehend how men and women are unique in terms of their expectations from a relationship.
Women often blame men for desiring only sex and emphasizing less on love. Conversely, most men feel frustrated as their ladies merely talk about love, but hesitate to show it. These and several other gender differences can make room for frustration and the lack of trust between the couple, thereby ruining their relationship.
Whether you are a man or a woman, this article will help you understand the opposite gender and offer effective tips to promote a long-term bond with your significant other.
Men and Women Focus on Different Aspects of a Relationship
As stereotypical and generalized as it may sound, men have issues identifying emotions, whereas women are comfortable with talking them. Since childhood, boys are taught to control their emotions and keep them buried inside. Also, young men tend to ‘act like a man’ when faced with problems and try to solve them by themselves.
Girls, on the other hand, are accustomed to sharing their feelings with others, making them more vocal about their problems compared to boys.
Likewise, when it comes to relationships, a man chooses his lady based on the prospects of lovemaking, and most probably ends up falling in love with her; whereas a woman generally chooses her man based on emotions (love) and ends up enjoying intimate moments with him.
More often than not, men seem to be afraid of committing to a relationship and giving up their single life. In contrast, women generally tend to look forward to tie the knot. These differences often cause stress, proving to be disadvantageous when couples navigate their intimate relationships and married lives.
What Happens When Men Prioritize Sex & Women Focus on Love?
The debate over what men and women expect from a relationship is getting increasingly complex with time. Their differences in expectations may lead to the below-mentioned relationship problems, thereby complicating and weakening their bond.
1. Sexual Frustration
The importance of sex in a relationship cannot be understated, yet it can never become the foundation of a relationship. The difference in the sexual desire levels among the couple usually leads to frustration, disconnect, mistrust, infidelity, and finally separation or divorce. This is especially true when lovemaking is more of an emotional experience for a woman and merely a physical experience for a man.
2. Lack of Commitment and Trust
Early on in a relationship, couples tend to care for each other, make allowances for differences, and push away nascent desires in the hope of strengthening the bond. However, over a period of time, couples with varied sexual appetites and mutually exclusive interests tend to move away from each other. This leads to the lack of commitment and trust between couples.
3. Increased Risk of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship
When one partner only wants to get intimate and the other emotional, the fear of abandonment may lead either of them to control the relationship by being abusive or making irrational demands, thereby causing stress between them.
Effective Tips for Developing a Healthy Long-Term Relationship
Both the partners have an equal role to play in strengthening their bond. The key is to focus on making the relationship romantic, relaxing, and happy.
A love relationship blossoms when the couple understands and accepts each other’s strengths and shortcomings. Men and women in a serious relationship should learn to accept their differences without judgment and resentment to enjoy their differences and strengthen their bond.
Even as a man inherently tends to focus on sex and a woman on love, the tips shared below will help each gender to build a strong intimate relationship that can last him/her a lifetime.
Gentlemen, Show Some Love!
1. Make Her Feel Secure
Since childhood, girls are often trained to be wary of anyone who poses a threat to their self-esteem, sexuality, and safety. Consequently, women inherently feel the need for security and trust in a relationship.
Make your woman feel loved and safe by showing that you are always there to care for her. When she learns to trust your strength, she will open up to you emotionally and sexually, allowing your relationship to grow stronger each day.
2. Do Little Things with Great Love
You do not need to invest in expensive gifts or arrange a lavish candlelit dinner to express your feelings for your lady. Do simple things to express your affection. Clear the dinner table, wash dishes together, walk her to the bus stop, or watch a romantic movie together to make her feel loved.
3. Lend Her a Caring Ear
A woman often wants her man to be aware of her emotional state. She doesn’t necessarily need a solution to her problems, just an empathetic listener will suffice most of the time. Instead of cutting her conversation short and offering a solution to her problems, listen to all she has to say. She will appreciate that you are investing time in the relationship and actually care about her life.
4. Make Her Feel Sexy
Though she looks for love in a relationship, a woman needs to feel sexually desirable. She wants to make sure that you are physically and emotionally attracted to her.
Remember to compliment your partner for her looks. Indulge in some public display of affection (PDA) once in a while to tell her how attractive she is. Most women do not prefer a full-blown PDA; yet, they love it when their partner holds hands, hugs her, whispers romantic nothings, and/or plants a goodbye kiss on her forehead. Depending on her comfort level, stick to these acceptable public displays of affection to convey your feelings for her.
Ladies, Control Your Emotions!
1. Understand That Sex and Intimacy in a Loving Relationship Are Indescribably Wonderful
It’s true, sex is the most primal and important thing for a man in a relationship as it is the manner in which he expresses himself emotionally. Emotional intimacy and a satisfying sex life are critical aspects of a relationship that help in cementing the bond you share with your partner.
Furthermore, research reveals that lovemaking contributes uniquely to relationship satisfaction and overall wellbeing.
If your man loves, cares for, and respects you, sex will only help you feel closer to him, building a solid foundation for your relationship.
2. Give Him the Space He Deserves
Guys are happy when the relationship is doing well. They love their personal space and expect their partner to treat them with love and respect.
Interfering too much in your man’s life can drive him crazy, making him feel edgy about spending his life with you. Believe it or not, he abhors walking on eggshells to avoid emotional drama.
If you want to strengthen your love bond, give your man some space, enabling him to get rid of the ‘mask’ he has to wear to meet societal expectations. Once he realizes that he can let his guard down and be himself in your company, he will go to the end of the earth to be with you.
3. Remember: You Cannot Force Him to Commit
Even though your relationship is going well, it can be tough for your man to fully commit to you. That doesn’t mean he loves you any less, will never commit, or wants to break up with you.
It is normal for men to postpone or avoid discussions about getting engaged or married. Give your partner some time off and hang out with your girl gang or engage yourself in a hobby for a change. If he truly loves you, this lone time will help him appreciate your presence in his life.
However, if you find yourself stuck in a noncommittal relationship, you mustn’t commit to it! Your partner must realize that if he doesn’t step up and make up his mind, he will lose you.
For a love relationship to be truly satisfying, couples should have a deep understanding of the general differences between men and women, and how they view lovemaking and the emotions associated with it. Failure to appreciate these differences can lead to misunderstandings and frustration, thereby ruining the beautiful bond they share.
The information shared in this article will serve as an effective guide for couples wanting to understand the opposite sex and strengthen their love.
