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Category Archives for Relationship Advice

12 New Year’s Resolutions You and Your Partner Should Make This 2018

Can you believe it? In a span of a week, we’ll say adieu to 2017 and welcome 2018 with open arms. Have you prepared your annual “New Year’s Resolution” list yet?

Resolutions often get a bad rap but they work for you if you give your 100% in taking a leap and making significant changes in your life. And they say that two is better than one, so fulfilling these promises with your significant other can help you stick to your words, and hopefully strengthen your bond. Instead of “New Year, New Me,” how about “New Year, New Us”?

Have you thought about the changes you’d like to see? What are the positive differences you want to achieve as an individual and as a couple? What are the issues you have to talk about? And what are the ones you have to let go?

If you’re looking forward to another blissful year with your partner and you want to improve not just your bond but your individuality as well, here are some resolutions to list down and achieve.

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love life

How to Improve Your Love Life in 5 Effective Steps

They say that when you’re single, the world is your oyster, and in many ways that’s true. There are plenty of advantages to being single, but at the end of the day, we’re all longing for that one person who will be everything. We want a friend, a confidant, a lover and someone around whom we can be our most authentic self. In today’s strange dating world you could be taking all the steps that seem right to you, but still fall short. Times have definitely changed, and in order to get to ‘the one’ there seem to be a lot more obstacles than before. Still, that’s not a reason to give up.

No, this is the time when you pick yourself up, even after the worst of experiences and try something new. You know the saying – you can’t do the same thing and expect different results. These five steps are probably something you haven’t tried before, and they are bound to get your love mojo back, whether you’re single and looking for love or already dating and searching for ways to improve a relationship.

Compromise with a twist

The general rule of thumb is that relationships are about compromise, and there is great truth to that. One of the biggest mistakes people make comes as a result of misinterpretation of the concept. While you should do things for the other person that aren’t exactly your cup of tea, such as for instance going hiking even though you’re not exactly outdoorsy, there is a fine line between compromise and accepting things that truly bother you. Certain types of behavior are unacceptable, they’re what we call deal-breakers, and when these arise, you need to have an open conversation with the person you’re dating and express your feelings.

If they are worthy and willing to make an effort for the sake of the relationship, they will change these habits. If not, your frustration will continue to increase. Sometimes being smart is knowing when to call it quits. For those who are single – try to see the potential in someone, and don’t discard a possible relationship as soon as you notice one flaw.

Know your worth

When you look back at your dating record, do you sometimes get the feeling that you’ve been dating the same guy over and over again? We all have a pattern, and when picking a certain type of person is one of yours, you need to put an end to it. This is where doing the same thing and expecting the same results resonates most true. If things aren’t working out and you keep dating, it’s because you’re constantly choosing virtually the same guy, and that guy is not the one for you. Step out of your comfort zone and realize that you deserve better.

As an experiment, just once go out with someone completely different from your usual type, and you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how refreshing this change could be. This next person might not be the one, even though you might be insanely attracted to them. Always be aware of that there is a battle of lust vs. love going on, and try to keep your head above the clouds and not get swept up by the first. Dip your feet in the water, date several different types, and ultimately you’ll find the one that truly fits. There are many things one should compromise on, but the choice of partner is not one of them. Always know your worth  and never settle for a treatment that leaves plenty to be desired.

No such thing as perfect

People are quick to notice the shortcomings of others, but quite reluctant to accept and acknowledge their own. If you’re the kind of person who always claims to be right, and whatever goes sour is someone else’s fault, you need to take a long hard look in the mirror and reexamine your own actions. Taking your share of the blame, whether for a bad date or a small fight that escalated, there are always two sides of the story. When in a fight, instead of instinctively placing the blame on the other person, step out of your body and listen to the words coming out of your own mouth and pay attention to your body language. Believe us, it takes two to tango.

In coupling and in singleness

You should never, ever stop improving yourself and lose sight of who you are. This isn’t only relevant for your love life, although it can be a great bonus. Never stop doing the things you love, chasing your passions, taking up hobbies – in short, never stop elevating yourself, culturally, spiritually, intellectually. Being the best possible version of yourself inevitably increases your sense of self-worth, and your positive and confident attitude as well as all the wonderful quirks and interests make you incredibly attractive. People pick up on that – the right people that is, so the more complete you are as a person, the more high-quality people you will attract. It applies to co-workers, friends and potential partners.

Out of want, not out of need

Never enter a relationship when you’re at your loneliest. That is when we are prone to accepting whatever little attention is given to us. Loneliness often leads to desperation, and that in turn can make you fall in the arms of a completely wrong person, simply because you needed a pair of hands to hold you. These kinds of relationships inevitably make you feel stuck and you end up resenting the person, thinking they’ve tricked you into being with them. Accept the loneliness, work on yourself, and when you realize that you want someone instead of desperately needing someone, you will be able to make much better choices.

Smartphones Don’t Ruin Relationships – Sick Phone Habits Do

A smartphone is a powerful invention designed to keep us connected, and it’s ironic how it also becomes the culprit for keeping most people apart. But the question is, should smartphones take all the blame?

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Three Steps To Resolving Conflicts Without Starting A Fight

Why do most relationship issues go unresolved? Because you hesitate to talk about them.
Why do you hesitate to talk about them? Because you don’t want to start a fight.
Why don’t you want to start a fight? Because you’re so worried that expressing anger will damage your relationship.
Why are you so worried that expressing anger will damage your relationship? Because the foundation you built was thin.
Why was the foundation thin? Because you leave most relationship issues unresolved.

It’s a cycle, a tiresome cycle many relationships fall into. It goes on and on, leaving two strangers walking on eggshells, constantly trying to avoid sparking negative emotions. We consider relationships where two people regularly swear at yell at each other unhealthy, but relationships, where two people are keeping issues under the rug to refrain from heated arguments, are just as terrible.

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Before The Wedding – 4 Ways to Make Your Long Distance Relationship Work for You

long distance relationships

It can be difficult for a relationship to work ordinarily, but it’s even tougher to make a long
distance relationship work sometimes. If you have a real connection though, there’s no need
to give up! I’ve got some great ways to make your long distance relationship work for you
even if you live far away from your significant other.

How to do Long Distance?

I’ll tell you right away that long distance doesn’t work for everyone, and these tips won’t
necessarily help every relationship. Long distance is difficult, but these tips can certainly give
you a fighting chance!

Make Commitments

It’s difficult to really commit yourself to a person who’s so far away, but in order to give your
relationship a chance, you’ve got to really go for it. First, you’ve got to accept that the
situation will be tough, and from there, you’ll be better able to really mentally prepare
yourself and work on how you respond to one another. As soon as you know that both of you
are really committed, you’ll be able to take it more seriously.
Once you make commitments, be sure to communicate to reaffirm them! You can make a
plan to talk or just go randomly using skype, chats, or texts. Just be sure to stay in contact.

Understanding

Make sure you understand each other. Agree to what you’re both getting into and the
situation in general, says wedding planner Martina from factory51.com.au. She’s met with
couples that have come from long distance relationships, and knows that the best way to
avoid jealousy, concern, and frustration is to understand one another.
That means that you’ve got to ask even those awkward questions, like if the relationship is
open, are you both dating, are you trying to make this work, or if you’re just testing the
waters. No matter what, be sure to stay on the same page.

Save Your Money

This might seem a little odd, but yes, you should save your money. A lot goes into long
distance, including gas charges, phone bills, bus tickets, rental cars, or even plane tickets,
so you’ve got to make sure you have some money to spend! Don’t let money prevent you
from this wonderful connection when you want to meet up and have some fun.

Keep the Fire Going

Long distance relationships, like any other relationships, need love and attraction. If you
want this to go anywhere, you have to keep things spicy! Keep your partner in your mind,
tell them what you love about them, have a little fun talking or showing some skin over
skype, and do whatever you can to stay familiar with one another.

It does sound like a lot of work, but it actually isn’t! People do this stuff normally in
relationships anyway, and if you want this relationship to work, you’ve got to put some effort
in it. With a little effort, you can definitely make your relationship last.

Conclusion

I know how difficult it can be to make a relationship work, especially a long distance one, but
it’s possible if you take a deep breath and follow some of these tips. Once you talk with one
another and reaffirm your commitments, you can find ways to move forward with trips, chats,
and new experiences. Don’t give up that connection if you’ve found it!

And before you start panning your wedding, and booking wedding venues etc etc, make sure you are in a healthy relationship.

Listen and understand your partner

The art of listening

More often than not, couples face the perils of communication blunders these days. Surrounded by devices, we rely too much on connectivity to get through and keep in touch with our beloved ones. The truth is that, however useful, digital communication can inevitably lead to detachment and despair: flat batteries, signal flaws, miscarried messages, mobile phones left behind, etc. These examples are as frequent as irritating and may put the stability of your relationship at risk. That’s why, you must always remain personal and encourage opportunities for face-to-face conversation so that the one you love feels understood and cared for.

Seizing all chances

It is essential to establish positive bonds with the people we love through different means. Some may prefer to hold hands and simply wander round a park, while others could choose eating out and having endless conversations over dinner.

Either on the phone, sitting side by side while driving, peacefully strolling on the beach or even walking your dog, simple occasions may open up a whole realm of communication lapses from which you and your partner will easily profit. Mutual understanding will pave the way for the pursuit of projects. Goals will be set in a state of common grounds that will entice how each person feels and increase his / her motivation.

Understanding yourself

We must give it more important to seek to understand ourselves, rather than to do it with our respective partners. In a relationship that we have with our partner it is better that we slow down for a while, and spend some time reflecting on our own needs and feelings

For you, in a way, to properly attune yourself to your needs and feelings, you should give more due attention to your bodily sensations. This allows you to identically identify what is happening to you internally so that you can express it openly to your partner. Anything however trivial or disturbing it may be worth mentioning, both you and your partner will benefit from it, and your partner will certainly thank you.

Understanding our partners requires a lot of patience on our part, requires that you do not express your opinion for an approximate range of time, without interrupting our partner, you have to be as if you are entirely in paused. You should give your partner all the attention that she or he deserves, do not interrupt him every moment to ask him or her some question that has begun to be formulated deep inside your mind while your partner has told you everything it needs to be told. It really costs a lot to dedicate to our significant other excessive attention, it requires a certain practice, yet it is extremely valuable, and you could consider it a kind of gift, a beautiful gift that you make to your partner: a gift that allows you to your partner be seen as they really are and for what they truly need.

Tackling criticism

It is never too late to start listening. Throughout long-term relationships, some people are constantly whining and will complain about everything related to their partner. This might shed light onto dissatisfaction or uneasiness for not being heard. When criticism sets its roots within two lovers, it is often hard to get over crisis and recover the fresher and simpler sensations of the old days. Needless to say, both the complained-about and the complainer suffer as the conflict becomes stronger.

We should be alert and keep in mind we must give a hearing to our partner showing that we respect his / her opinion and will endeavor to please them as much as we can. The exchange of personal points of view is nothing to fear, it can be nourished as a healthy habit so as to mutually collaborate and improve the quality of the relationship.

 

You have to pick the right time to talk to your partner

Sometimes you need to be listened to when you want to express something that troubles you. But maybe your partner can be busy with something else at the moment, such as: Watching the game, cooking dinner, trying to sleep, any work that you brought to your home, or simply not in the right frame of mind at that time. If you realize this, just be patient and shut up to tell your partner what you are worried about or at a later time. If it is something extremely important and you want to communicate it to your partner, you can ask: “Is there time available to be able to talk?” And depending on the response of your partner you can settle for the following two options. Talk about what is troubling you, or wait a reasonable time to do so. If you are the listener, no doubt your partner would appreciate the same.

 

The need to know your partner well

You must be observant and learn to know your partner in order to understand what you are trying to communicate. For this you need not only partially hear what your partner tells you, but develop a great listening ability for your partner. If what you do is usually just to hear, in reality what you are doing is worrying more about what happens inside you during the conversation, and what you are going to respond to. Instead, listening means caring about the person in front of you and trying to understand the situation that is happening. I assure you that developing the ability to listen is one of the best gifts you can give your partner.

The importance of showing empathy

It is important to give a sample of understanding to our partner, one has to get “deep inside the skin of the other” as it is said, doing this will be able to better understand the reasons behind our partner need to worry, what can really feel your partner, and the need to make your partner feel that we can take care of them and ourselves for that matter. It is not a question of wanting to take advantage of the weakness that our partner may feel, but to convey the message that one is able to put oneself in its place. So we will be generating in our partner empathy.

Avoid prejudging the message your partner is telling you

You should listen to what your partner wants to convey to you, without any interruption except for an important question or additional comment that has to do with the message you are letting him know. You should never interpret the message from “your” point of view, instead of the point of view that matters is that of your partner to let it know to you the message and therefore their point of view.

Don’t get carried away and don’t overreact

Either that which your partner is communicating is serious or you do not have to take into account how difficult it will doubtless have taken you to have gathered the courage to tell the message. You should be very clear about the perspective, that of your partner and yours; do not alter, you must be calm, you must let reason prevail over a fit of fury. You must speak in a softer tone, in a given case even loving and tender.

 

 

Images: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Author byline: Article written by Martin, who is owner and writer of his Dating Website (www.russia-girls.net). He believes that online dating is great for connecting people from the whole world using new technologies. He enjoys learning about human relationship to improve and share his knowledge about online relationships.

 

 

 

7 Ways to Spice Up a Long Relationship

Long relationships can be a challenge for both parties and maintaining them will usually take some creativity and a lot of effort. However, relationships also vary from couple to couple and to know what needs to be done you usually have to analyze your relationship first. It’s important that both you and your partner are aware of the situation that you’re in and that something needs to be done to keep things going. So without further ado, here are some of the best ways to spice up your relationship and get it close to what it was when you first started dating.

Ditch the Routine

The worst thing that can happen to your passion is the daily routine between you and your partner, especially if you’re living together. Who packs the dishes and who does the laundry can be a real downer and something you need to forget about for a while. This also applies to your bedroom, as sex sometimes becomes something that you just do without investing a lot of yourself in it. A good place to start is to start seducing your partner at times you don’t usually do. Getting intimate outside of the comfortable hours is an important thing, which is why we’re all attracted to unexpected. Also, there’s no reason why your bedroom should be the only place for your intimacy.

Travel Together

Like we previously stated, new places can be quite a stimulator when it comes to long relationships. Traveling to a destination where you’ve never been before will make you walk the streets together and do the things you might’ve forgotten about. Not to mention that you’ll have the needed time only for the two of you, which in itself is enough to get on this list. Romance takes effort, and anything new you do will inevitably affect it. Take your partner to a dinner or go to an event in the place you’ve picked as your travel destination and you’ll immediately see the difference.

Redecorate Your Bedroom

The bedroom is the most important room in one’s relationship and it should be treated as a shrine of sorts. Try to get rid of everything that serves as a distraction and you should have an easier time seducing your partner. It’s not always easy to set up your bedroom to be sexy and the most important thing about it is to really know and care about your partner. Long lasting relationships are all about respecting other’s wishes as well, so make sure you redecorate the room with that in mind and from there you’ll have an easier time spicing things up.

Dress Up For the Occasion

Remember the time when you took quite some time to dress when you were going on a date with your dear? The fact is, as time passes by and as our partner gets to know us, we usually invest less effort into looking great. Actually, looking like we’ve invested a lot of time in it. And not only that, but it’s also important to dress in a way that tickles your partner’s imagination. Bring out the unexpected look you’ve always wanted and take it a few steps further. Sometimes you can do this with your clothes, but it’s usually better just to go shopping and get something completely new.

Be Unpredictable

Some people enjoy being in their comfort zone, but most of us get more excited about the things that take us by surprise. Whether it’s sexting, or taking your partner to a striptease bar, you should always try to show that they don’t know everything about you. Being unpredictable can be difficult at times and it certainly takes some practice to get it right, but don’t be afraid to do it because of that. If your partner can guess what you’re doing at every point of the day then you’re clearly not doing something right. Intrigue is the name of the game here and it can be quite powerful when it comes to maintaining a relationship.

Roleplay

It might sound silly to you at first, but everyone loves roleplay. Not the act itself, but every single person had a crush on something or someone. Again, it’s important to know what your partner likes but it’s also important to take them up by surprise when you actually go on and do it. Whether you dress up as a maid or play the part of a naughty nurse, it’s up to you to figure out which one will work the best. It will put a giant smile on your partner’s face and he’ll immediately know that you’re a keeper. Don’t be shy, if you can share a bathroom you can also act a little bit.

Go Naughty

Alright, it’s time to put it out in the open. Sex life can be a disaster if it’s just happening the same way from day to day. Most of us still nurture a crush or two for a favorite actor or an actress and we’d love to have a chance to be with them. But you probably also love your partner and you want to build a long-lasting relationship, so it’s time to bring out the big guns. Here are some of the tips to really get things going in the bedroom.

  • Sex Toys – I know what you’re thinking, but these can be quite a game changer when used by couples. Go to a sex shop together and find the ones you’d love to test out together. If you can’t even talk about it with your partner, it might already be too late.
  • Hire Some Company – For the brave couples out there who really trust each other hiring a third person through Liaisons Brothel in Sydney can go a long way in revitalizing your sex drive.
  • Outdoor Intimacy – Just hear me out – it doesn’t have to end with sex. By simply going towards it you can already achieve your goal and let things wrap up in your bedroom. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with it even if you go for the home run. You wouldn’t be the first.

Conclusion

While sex life is a big part of any long-term relationship, it’s also what you do and how you behave towards each other that defines a good relationship. By sending a simple smile from across the room you can do a lot more than by saying something. In a different situation, a quiet ‘I love you’ will send shivers through your partner’s spine. The most important thing to remember is to always do your best and try to do something new. Relationships are built, they aren’t a gift from the sky. It’s just that some people need less effort to maintain them than others.

I’m Currently Dating Two Men – Is That Okay?

I never thought I would be in a position like this. Five years ago my husband of sixteen years and I mutually broke up because we decided it was no longer working which was hard to admit after all that time together. After a long stint in which I have been single and enjoying time to myself I now feel like I am ready to move on, start dating and look for love again with the right man. It was a hard decision to even decide to date again because I felt if after a sixteen year marriage it doesn’t work out then what hope do we have? But then I realised that we actually weren’t happy for almost half of those sixteen years.

I’m back trying to find new love and have had a few dilemmas along the way, including this one which I’ve decided to share with you.

Dating Two and a Half Men

I took to online dating not long ago after “peer pressure” from my friends. I write peer pressure in inverted commas since it didn’t take much persuading from my friends for me to agree that it was the best course of action. I’m now a fifty three year old woman and even though I still go out and socialise with friends quite often, it’s rare that I would come in contact with a man on a romantic level. I also feel like time is running out for me (sorry for those who are my age or older who would rightfully disagree) to find love again.

It didn’t take long after I signed up before I got talking to someone, maybe about a week. But that didn’t get anywhere. I soon learned that it takes patience with online dating, at least if you’re willing to take your time to find someone you want to have a serious future with.

Having said that, after about three weeks I got talking to someone I can only describe as a gentlemen at least by the way we conversed online. But just like London buses, another man came along typically on the same evening. I thought there could be no harm in talking to two men online. Besides, at this point it was just harmless conversation and getting to know them.

Things seemed to escalate quite fast with both of them, not on purpose but organically. They were both extremely nice but seemed to have slightly different personalities. For example they were both humorous but in opposing ways. After about two weeks of talking online as well as by text messages to both of these men they both asked to meet up within a few days of each other. When I was asked by the first gentlemen, of course I willingly agreed to meet up, not anticipating that there was a strong chance of the second gentlemen asking me sooner or later. But I live my life in the present and don’t like to think too far ahead. Perhaps this was a reason to alter that logic and way of living as of course he did ask to meet up and suddenly I saw myself in a position agreeing to meet up with two different men in the space of a few days.

The reason for the title “two and half men” was because I then began talking to yet ANOTHER man online. But there was no hint of meeting up which is why I counted that as “half”.

Hard Decision

I now have a hard decision to make after dating both of these men and both going exceptionally well. I am no nearer to deciding which one I would like to carry on dating so do I carry on dating them both? I would like to think that at some point there would be a factor which would push me towards one and not the other but how long that takes is the concerning thing.

Like I said before, I have never been in a position like this before so it’s not something I would say I’m proud of. But perhaps I am overthinking and exaggerating the seriousness of this. Maybe I should just embrace it while I can and enjoy the ride!

Right or Wrong?

So here’s my question to you. Was I right or wrong to agree to meet up with two different men? What would you have done if you were in a similar position?

The way I have been thinking about it is that I was always going to have to let at least one of these men down sooner or later. In that respect I guess it was wrong of me to supposedly lead one of them on. I hate having to let people down.

But having said that, you have to be selfish in life sometimes right? Plus it was still early days and so I had to meet up with them to get to know them better. If I had stopped talking to one of them sooner then I would have never have known what could have been. In my mind that would’ve been foolish.

 

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How To Balance Work And Pleasure

Balancing work and pleasure can be a tricky task. Most of us are guilty of falling in to a set routine every single week. Before we know it a week turns in to a month and eventually a year passes by in the blink of an eye without having set aside time to enjoy our own life.
So how do we change that and find a balance between working and enjoying ourselves?

The older we get the quicker time seems to fly by. This is because we end up cruising in auto-pilot every day. We become so fixed in to a daily routine that we forget to pay ourselves back with time for ourselves.

Working 9 to 5, going to the gym, having dinner and going to bed is a very common example of a Monday to Friday lifestyle of plenty of seniors in this day and age or even for the younger generation for that matter. Snapping out of that routine can actually be very easy. It is just a case of making the effort to make new plans in the week and arranging to do something different. For example, going out for a midweek meal, going to the cinema or even meeting up with a friend for a catch up rather than going home after work and having the same dinner at home is a simple place to start.

Understandably, for some it’s a case of expense in that they don’t wish to spend unnecessary money during the week. But there’s no reason a midweek meal can’t be cheap and cheerful. For the sake of twenty pounds, it’s actually quite healthy to keep the mind active by going out for a meal and socializing. But what about those of us who are single and are looking for a partner to spend that time with?

When it comes to senior singles and relationships, many turn to online dating because it’s the only way for them to find other mature singles to spend their time with. But once they do arrange a date this is the start of a change in lifestyle. Pleasure begins to take a forward step and life can suddenly become a lot more exciting. Work no longer dictates the individual and Wednesday can become the new Friday. It’s hugely important for people of all ages, especially seniors to maintain this lifestyle when possible to remain mentally active and happy.

Don’t let work take over your life, experience some fun, meet new people and start smiling again. Visit www.seniordatingblog.com for more advice and tips on all things senior and dating.

 

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Dating Is A Patience Game

Have a little patience

Finding “the one” is rarely easy and to be honest it shouldn’t be either. What’s the point in settling for a mediocre partner in terms of your similarities and compatibility when there are thousands of single people out there. There’s no doubt in my mind that there is a person suited for everyone in this world but it’s just taking the time to find them. Dating is a game of patience.

Understandably, we become desperate sometimes to find a partner we can share our laughs, tears and experiences with but it’s important that we share those moments with the right person. After all, if you truly want to spend the rest of your life with this person then you can forever have these moments to reminisce on.

Never too old

There seems to be a misinterpretation that once you hit a certain age that it is then too late to start dating or find the perfect match. Well that isn’t true at all. There are millions of people around the world that are single aged 40 and above who are still being hit by Cupid’s arrow and finding their true love. The majority of the time it’s over online dating websites because that’s the easiest way for them and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. There are hundreds of senior dating websites online that you can use to slowly search for your ideal partner with patience. There’s no rush when you’re sitting behind a computer.

Taking your time to find the right person might seem like a chore but in the long term it will be much more worth it. The question you have to ask is would you rather settle for an average person that you find “OK” or take your time, have a bit of patience and find that partner that you love sharing your life with where your heart skips a beat every time you hear from them.

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