Welcome to Singles & Married Blog

Download The Golden Rules of Online Dating


The possibilities of making the kinds of connections you want are very realistic, and many long lasting relationships and marriages have begun via online dating services, not to mention casual relationships as well if that is what you prefer. The possibilities are all right there and waiting for you, but there are a few key rules you need to know and follow in order to find your perfect date online. Download to learn The Golden Rules of Online Dating – 6 essential rules to finding the perfect online date!

Wedding Gift Ideas The Bride And Groom Will Love

A celebration of someone’s love – there are so many things to be excited about. You have to choose a dress or suit, shoes, gift… Wait, gift?! Two families work so hard arranging the event, so the couple deserves the perfect gift. While you are choosing what to wear, you have to think about the couple’s wishes and choose a gift that they will appreciate the most. Yes, you can always give them money, but maybe you can try with something more unique, personalized, something that will make a real impression. If you want to give them a thoughtful gift that the couple will show off to their friends, or that will stay in their heart as a nice memory, follow our suggestions and get inspired!

A gift for travelers

The couple is starting their marriage journey, so you can compare it with traveling. Which country did they go to, and where do they want to travel? Buy them a globe with corks so they can easily track their travels and explorations. This can be a great reminder of their goals and wishes. Also, you can buy them matching travel bags with their last name, or even with a Mr. and Mrs. tags as an accessory.  

Personalized gift

At weddings, everything is about the couple. If you know them well, you can find a nice photo of them and print it on any decorative item, such as a photo frame, photo collage, throw pillows, or even a lamp. Moreover, you can think about their first Christmas together and put their names on a nice ornament or an embroidered stocking. This kind of gift they would not only cherish themselves, but they would also love to show off to others. Also, this will show them that you’re thoughtful and that you celebrate their love yourself.

Surprise gift basket

If you want to surprise your dear friends, you have to be creative. We’ll give you a little hint – buy all these small decorative things you know the couple will like and put them in a basket. For example, you can find a magazine holder, carpets, candlesticks, a jewelry box, ice bucket, table lamp, tray, or anything that suits their home decoration the best. If you like this idea, you can always take a look at some beautiful Karavan homewares and accessories. Next, you have to think about gift decoration. When you pack all of these things in a basket, put their favorite flowers and chocolate in it. This will bring a surprise effect, so when they remove the flowers, they will find all these things they love.  

Tickets to a class

What does the couple have in common? If they are passionate about cooking, dancing, history, culture, or anything else, you can buy them tickets for a class or course. If you want to be funny, you can even buy them tickets for a lap dance class. They will probably get a lot of items for their home from other guests, so this gift can be something different and priceless. They will get out of the house and enjoy each other’s company. After they finish the course, they will both have a skill that will stay in the family forever.

Kitchen appliances

For most families, the breakfast is their favorite time. They are sharing their troubles and expectations and discussing them while preparing for a long day. So, think about buying a coffee or a sandwich maker built for two. These things can make their mornings easier and give them time for chatting.   

Something useful

What if they’re not a romantic couple? The truth is that not everyone likes the matching towels or pillows. If the couple is practical and they like to do things on their own, you can always buy them a tool set. For a couple that has just started living together, this can be extremely helpful. This set can last forever, and they can even get creative and try to make things on their own. Moreover, you can add an inspiring note such as “build your life together”.

 

You have so many exciting options, so which one would you choose for your wedding? Think about the couple and you will know which suggestion is the best for your gift.

meet people online

How Did Tinder Influence College Dating?

Anyone who wants to meet people online should ask the college kids for help, right? Well, wrong. You’d be surprised to learn that college students are a lot more old-fashioned than modern technology and media would have us believe. Today, we take a closer look at how college students use dating apps, and how they prefer to find new dates.

meet people online

Tradition VS Technology

According to a study which included 3,500 college students done by Abodo, the apartment hunting app, these kids might be online for the better part of their day, but still prefer to meet new people through traditional means. Of those who participated in the survey, only 4 percent said they liked to meet matches using dating apps. A total of 80 percent of survey participants said they liked to meet through mutual friends or shared interests, while some 15 percent said they preferred to leave things up to chance, and meet people when out and about.

The Purpose of Dating Apps

These results look pretty old-fashioned, and certainly not what we expect to see. At the same time, college kids do use dating apps, but they don’t prefer to use them to date. Over 90 percent of respondents say they use Tinder and other apps for purposes other than to hook up with someone over the weekend. In other words, Tinder & Co have not led to a culture of endless hook-ups, as is the popular belief.

Those other purposes include entertainment, which is a response given by 35 percent of Tinder, Bumble and Grindr users. Also, 15 percent of women and 9 percent of men said they used the apps for an ego boost, and the rest of the respondents said they used dating apps to find friends, although the term “friend” wasn’t clearly defined.

The Popular Apps

In terms of dating apps that surveyed college students used, 85 percent said they preferred Tinder, 17 percent said Bumble was their first choice, and OKCupid came in first for almost 9 percent of the respondents.

In practical terms, these results suggest that college kids live in a structured social environment that seems to present plenty of opportunity to meet people organically, without having to enlist the help of technology. When we take the size of campuses into account, it actually makes sense that they build their romantic lives in the offline world.

At the same time, their habits are likely to change when they graduate and enter the workforce where they won’t have as much time to socialize, and are expected to lean on dating apps much more to find suitable partners.

When it comes to Tinder influencing the dating habits of college students, this survey suggests Tinder is most often used out of boredom, not to cure loneliness or find a date for the upcoming weekend. This is not to say college kids aren’t dating as crazy, but they sure don’t depend on their phones to connect them with potential partners.

meet people online

Instagram is a Dating Site, too! Here’s how it works

Back in the day, there was a rather clear distinction between matchmaking platforms and social media sites. For example, if you wanted to meet people online, you had to make a profile on a dating site. Nowadays, that’s not exactly the case. Most people these days are using Facebook and Twitter as dating platforms, and up until recently, Instagram was the only app that wasn’t used for such purposes. However, after a few big changes, this app became one of the most popular dating sites out there. So, if you have Instagram and you want to use this particular app as a dating platform, here’s how it works.

The Stories Changed The Game

A few years ago when Instagram didn’t have stories, it was rather hard for people to know who is really interested in them, who likes their photos out of courtesy, and who’s actually “stalking” them. Today, however, stories are one of the main indicators that tell users who their biggest fans are. As you probably already know, once you finish watching someone’s story, that person receives a notification that you watched their content. So, by reviewing their notifications, users can easily determine if you’re just a follower or a secret admirer. Also, you can use this method to subtly state your intentions without being intrusive or straightforward.

Discover And Search Options Help People Find Exactly What They Want

It’s safe to say that the advanced and improved options like “search” and “discover” are helping people to find the perfect potential partner. The intuitive search engine allows them to easily track down any person they know, both in real life and via other social media websites. Also, if users want to find someone completely new, they can search the Instagram by using specific hashtags and they will find exactly what they’re searching for. For example, if a guy is looking for redheads, he can simply insert #redhead and #redhair hashtags and the app will provide him with a number of beautiful girls and photos on his feed. As you can see, searching for a specific type is easier on Instagram than on other matchmaking platforms.

Direct Messaging Transformed Instagram

One of the options that changed the game completely is, of course, direct messaging. As you know, at first, Instagram only had “like” and “comment” options, while messages and chats were reserved for Facebook, Twitter, and specialized dating platforms. Nowadays, however, Instagram users are able to send direct messages to their followers. Naturally, this particular option allowed people to contact users they are attracted to in a private manner. In other words, they can use the previous options we mentioned in the article to track down a perfect person, follow them, and contact them via messages. These intuitive and rather convenient options are the main reason why this social media site is now one of the most popular matchmaking spots on the Internet. Therefore, even though this network was never meant to serve this purpose, it’s safe to say that Instagram is now a dating app too.

BBW dating

How to find Love while on the Road for Work

Dating can take a lot of different forms. Some people prefer it the old-fashioned way, with approaching random people in bars and asking to buy them a drink, while others prefer one of many online dating niches, such as cougar or BBW dating. Then, there are those who love nothing more than to date people while travelling for work.

Being a travelling worker is not exactly the easiest type of job one can have. Keeping up with any sort of schedule while also being constantly on the move is hard enough as it is, which means people who also practice dating while doing a travelling job really like to play a game with hard rules. Still, this doesn’t mean that finding partner this way is impossible – which is why we’ve decided to share with you a few tips and tricks on how to find love while on the road for work.

BBW dating

 

Setting Ground Rules

The first and foremost thing you need to do in order to successfully date people while travelling for work is setting down some ground rules. What you need to remember here is you’re probably not going to spend a lot of time in one place, which means the dates you’re going on should be quick and “effective.”

In other words, you’ll have to get creative. “Let’s grab a drink” shouldn’t be your go-to line, but instead, you should make the best out of the time you have with the person you’re dating. If you’re going to date a local, make sure that they take you to see some of the attractions that location is known for.

Distance is Good

Dating while travelling for work can be tricky when it comes to maintaining a distance from the person you’re dating, since you have all the control over where you’ll be residing – but what you need to understand is that being close to the person you’re dating isn’t a smart idea.

While on the road for work, most people try to find a residence that’s near their date’s apartment or house, which is a mistake. You’ll want to keep your distance at an appropriate level if your goal is to allow that natural chemistry and love to blossom.

Separate Work from Pleasure

Even though your job is what brings you to any given location, it shouldn’t be the main focus of your dates. In other words, try to separate work from pleasure if you don’t want to bore or scare away the other person.

Most of us like to be in the company of ambitious and hard-working people. However, when these ambitions and work stories take up all the time you spend with someone, they’ll probably assume that you do nothing in life but work or that nothing seems to interest you enough for you to talk about it on a date.

Instead, make sure to mention what you do, but leave it at that. You’ll notice that your date will be much more interested in what you’re talking about if your topic is life goals, pets, food or something of the sort.

meet people online

10 Body Language Signs That Show He’s Into You

It’s safe to say that the traditional form of dating is not particularly popular these days, and the main reason is the fact that most singles prefer to meet people online. This way, they don’t have to read each other’s body language because it’s obvious they like each other. However, if you’re not a fan of cyber dating and you like to flirt with guys in person, you definitely need to learn how to read their body language. It will help you avoid some potentially awkward situations. Therefore, check out the 10 crucial signs that clearly show he’s into you.

He Does Everything To Get Close To You

When a guy likes a girl, he’ll do anything to get close to her. So, if your date is rearranging the chairs and tables at the restaurant just so he could sit close to you, he definitely likes you.

He Finds An Excuse To Touch You

Physical contact is one of the biggest sings that show he’s into you. Therefore, if your man flicks “something” off of your shoulder or tries to help you with something just so he could touch you, it’s a sure sign that he’s into you.

He Smiles All The Time

Most men don’t smile that much in public because they want to come across as tough alpha males. So, if your man can’t stop smiling during your date, it means that he feels rather comfortable around you.

The Eye Contact

If a guy gazes into your eyes without blinking, it’s clear, he fancies you! However, avoiding a direct eye contact on a date can also be a sign of affection.

He Keeps Looking At Your Lips

When a guy is desperate to kiss you, he will stare at your lips, fantasizing about the kiss. So, if you catch him looking, bite your lip and he’ll want you even more.

He Touches Your Forearm Every Time He Starts Talking

Like we mentioned before, physical contact is a sure sign of affection. Therefore, when a man touches a woman’s forearm every time he starts talking, it’s safe to say that he’s trying to get her attention.

He Touches Your Hair

A lot of guys state their intentions by touching a woman’s hair. So, if he compliments your hair while gently caressing it, you can be sure that he’s absolutely attracted to you.

He Sits Facing You

This is one of the subtlest but most important signs out there. If a guy is too shy to touch your hair or your forearm, he will display his interest by sitting directly across from you. This way he’ll be able to maintain eye contact throughout the entire date.

He Widens His Eyes When You Talk

Widened eyes and dilated pupils are definite signs of affection. So, if your partner widens his eyes when you talk, it means that he’s really interested in what you have to say.

He Leans Across The Table During The Conversation

Like we already said, when a man likes a woman, he’ll do anything to be close to her. Therefore, if your date is constantly leaning across the table during the conversation, you can be sure that he wants to be with you.

7 Reasons Why It’s A Good Idea To Get Back Together With Your Ex

Do you believe in the saying, “love is lovelier the second time around?”

Taking the cheesy, hopeless romantic statement aside, getting back with a former lover isn’t a piece of cake. The word “ex” often gets a bad rap. The two of you broke up for a reason, and you fear the possibilities of falling back into old habits and circumstances that didn’t work in the first place. You worry about how your friends and family would react. You’re afraid of being hurt again by the same person you tried to move on from.

But former sweethearts come in different forms. We all have those exes who made our life miserable and we’re good with never seeing them again. On the other hand, there are the ones who you’d be willing to befriend and rekindle with again if the time was right.

If you happen to reunite with someone special from the past and you’re contemplating whether to give it another shot or not, check out these things to see if your relationship is worth the second chance.

1. You had a clean break

You’ve been with this person for three years but due to several circumstances, you felt like it would be better to end the relationship. While it’s tempting to keep in touch with this person and replace the romantic relationship with friendship immediately, it wouldn’t be the best thing to do. The essence of ending a relationship is to grow apart.

Time heals, right?

Give it time. It would be better if you have spent a lot of months or years apart with no intention of future reconciliation. Have you cut off your contact after the breakup? Did you unfriend, unfollow, or block your ex so you can spend the time growing individually? Have you had the taste of life on your own? Did you do some soul searching?

After some time away from the person, you’ll have a clearer pair of eyes to figure out what’s best for you. By the time you reunite, you have a lot of new insights and discoveries about life and yourself, which you can apply on your fresh start.

2. You’re willing to start anew

Start from the start. Isn’t it nice to experience that “getting to know” stage all over again?

Sure, you are in love with the same person. But you’re living a different timeline now. You probably have a new circle of friends. Your career statuses have changed. You have new hobbies and interests to talk about. Your perspectives have evolved too. There are a lot of things to be discovered.

Okay, don’t fool yourselves that you’re “strangers again.” You’re not. The fact that you have a shared history will never disappear. Talking about things from the past is inevitable. But the point now is you have grown separately and you have learned from your previous mistakes. After growing apart, you tend to forget the petty things you fought about. You are restarting with a clean slate and healthier habits.

3. Your past relationship wasn’t a toxic one

Not all exes are the same. There are good exes and there are bad exes. The good exes are the ones whom you can totally relate to. You shared the same interests and you treated each other with compassion, trust, loyalty, and respect. It’s just that you realized you’re no good as a couple.

On the other hand, there are those exes who ruined you. They brought out the worst in you. They abused you physically and/or emotionally. And you got a sigh of relief when you two broke up.

For sure, you don’t want to get back with or even be friends with the latter.

4. The reason for why you broke up is fixable

Perhaps you broke up 5 years ago because of long distance relationship and this time, you’re residing in the same city. Or maybe one’s hectic schedule drew you apart but you’re in a more relaxed state now. Maybe you were just kids when you fell in love and you’ve grown older and wiser now.

If the reason the two of you broke up is no longer a problem anymore, then it’s okay to give it a second chance.

5. You have forgiven each other

It’s a must to seek forgiveness and accept one’s apology. Whether you admit it or not, your relationship is not normal. You’re unlike other brand new couples. You have a heavier baggage, so eliminate that massive burden from your chest.

6. You have let go of the grudges

If you’re thinking of getting back together, make sure you don’t carry the grudges from the past relationship to this new one. When you decide to open up your heart again to your past lover and forgive him/her, you accept to let go of the hurt and resentment so you can finally start over again. Avoid digging and bringing up old issues. Avoid making the other feel guilty about the past. Letting go is your sole ticket to happiness.

7. You understand each other now more deeply

Going back five years ago, you seemed to be living in an entirely different planet. You didn’t like the same things. Your ideas used to clash and every conversation wasn’t healthy.

Aside from healing wounds, time also changes people. Now, you discover that your needs, expectations, and goals have changed and these are aligned with your ex’s. You get along now more than ever. When you understand each other more deeply, you can love each other more deeply as well than you ever did before.

Author Bio: Carmina Natividad is one of the writers for The Relationship Room, a couples psychology institution specializing in relationship counseling and therapies for couples and families. When she’s not using her pen in writing self-help articles focused on love, dating, and relationships, she spends her time creating poems and screenplays, painting.

Happyrelationships

The Secret to Keeping your Sex Life Sexy is Simple

Married sex should be anything but boring. The longer you spend together as a couple the more you get to know each other emotionally and physically.

As long-term partners, you get to learn each other’s likes and dislikes, kinks and turn-offs, and have years’ worth of practice to make sure you’re both satisfied by the end of your romp. Truly, your sex life should actually be better the longer you’re together – not worse.

Still, if emotional intimacy in marriage is lacking, it can create problems in the bedroom. Your sex life should be fun and satisfying, not predictable and dull. Whether you’re bored in bed or are just looking to add a little spice to your sex life, look no further. Here are 8 tips for making your sex life even sexier.

1. Set the Mood

As long-term partners, all you and your spouse have to do to get the message across that you’re in the mood is make some simple eye-contact. Convenient? Yes. Romantic? Hardly.

There are charms to the occasional quickie, but when is the last time you and your spouse worked on seducing one another? One of the best things about getting married is that having sex is basically a given, but that doesn’t mean you should stop putting effort into the seduction process.

Stimulate your partner by setting the mood for lovemaking. Put on your favorite bedroom music, light some candles, and give each other massages. These things will stimulate sexual chemistry and make the payoff that much more exhilarating.

2. Roleplay Together

It’s time to get your acting chops ready, because you’re about to add a little drama into your sex life. One great way to spice up your sex is through a little harmless roleplay.

Roleplaying is great for boosting intimacy in marriage and your libidos since it allows you to stretch your creative muscles and act out dirty fantasies without actually putting yourself into danger.

Your imagination is often the key to a better sex life, so why not pretend to be someone else for a night and go wild? Pretend to be a student and teacher, pirate and wench, secretary and boss, dirty massage parlor, maid and boss, fake “hate sex”. Whatever your thrill, add it to the list of sexy roleplaying ideas you want to try.

3. Read to Each Other

Want to know how to spice up your sex life? Get creative.

Erotica is a great way to bring something new into the bedroom. Reading erotic stories to one another is a great start. Find a story that contains a fantasy you’re both curious about and take turns reading it to each other. Incorporate your naughty story as a regular part of foreplay and switch up the fantasies every once and a while.

Not only will this turn you both on, but the stories will also give you ideas for great role plays or new sex positions to try.

4. Play with Toys

Another great way to get creative in bed is to experiment with sex toys. These are designed, not to replace your partner, but to enhance the sex you’re already having.

It is thought that roughly 53% of women own a vibrator. This is not surprising, considering women are more likely to achieve orgasm during intercourse when adding a vibrating companion into the mix.

Don’t think that sex toys are just for her. There are plenty of other toys and additives you can incorporate into your sex life that will please both partners. Flavored or sensational lubricants, vibrating cock rings, dual stimulators, handcuffs, whips, ticklers, and orgasm gel are all great additions to your bedroom antics.

5. Communicate

Communication is key for any healthy relationship, and that includes talking about all things sex-related. When you talk to your partner about your desires, you build intimacy in marriage that teaches you both how to please one another.

Talk about what you like in bed, share your deepest fantasies, or do a sexy show-and-tell, talking them through the things you love while you’re actually in the act together. This fun instruction doubles as sexy dirty talk and is fun for both partners.

6. Break Your Routine

Routines in the bedroom can be nice. They help keep you focused and organized, are likely to get the orgasm every time. But, routines can also be monotonous.

Fight the bedroom boredom blues by mixing up your routine with new positions. Grab a book of sex positions and endeavor to try a new one each week. This is a great way to bond with your spouse while giving each other something new to look forward to.

You can also break your routine by taking sex out of the bedroom. Try fooling around somewhere new like on the couch, the kitchen table, or sit on the same side of the booth the next time you head out for a drink together and use some discreet handplay under the table.

7. Wear Lingerie

Lingerie is a great way to spice things up in the bedroom. For him, lingerie is a sexy way to be visually seduced by his partner. For her, wearing a lacy, silky garment that’s designed specifically to make her feel sexy and desirable is a huge ego-boost.

When you have self-confidence you’re more able to let go of your inhibitions in the bedroom. You can choose lingerie as tasteful, kinky, or risque as you are comfortable with.

So long what you’re wearing makes you feel hot and confident, it’s a winner. The bottom line is when you look good, you feel good, and feeling confident in the bedroom is one of the quickest ways to skyrocket your sex life.

Don’t let a long-term relationship be your excuse for a boring sex life. By setting the mood, building up your body confidence, fostering emotional intimacy, getting creative, and taking your time in bed, you and your spouse are sure to have a sex life that is anything but boring.

A Guide to Planning a Backyard Wedding at Home

A Guide to Planning a Backyard Wedding at Home

“A copy is worse than nothing,” Frank Herbert wrote, and his words have never rung more true. Today, being original has become the ultimate challenge. While it’s definitely easier to go with, than against the stream, there is also the fact that we are immersed in trends to the point of sensory overload.

It is no wonder then that most couples decide to go for the obvious – a generic wedding: renting a venue, deciding on a menu and sending invitations sounds like a no-brainer. But if you’re one of those lucky people with a nice garden or a backyard and would prefer your wedding to have a more intimate, more romantic feel, organising a backyard wedding might be a great idea.

Think of the possibilities

Having a wedding at home has many advantages, but most importantly, it will give you the freedom of being in control of every single detail, from picking the date and creating a fully customised menu to decorating and using the space to its full potential.

Since it offers a lot of convenience and flexibility, this could be a perfect solution for couples on a budget who are feeling creative and like to be in control of things.

Plan well beforehand

You will need to start planning at least six months in advance, the most obvious reason being thorough preparation of your backyard. If your backyard is already in great shape, all the better, but if not, you will want to consider preparing the lawn: sowing grass and planting takes time. Flooring one part of your backyard might also be a good idea – it will even the terrain and prevent sticky situations in case of rain.

Also, you will need to check your insurance coverage, obtain a party permit if necessary, consider parking capacities for your guests, and, of course, check with the neighbours to see if they’d object to the noise.

Be prepared for anything

Once you’ve made sure your backyard will be able to accommodate your guests, carefully consider the furniture and the amenities that you plan to use and make an outline of where to place them. You will have to provide an adequate number of tables, chairs, benches, lounges and other seating to make everyone comfortable.

Portable bathrooms or toilets and washing stations are a must. Since at least one toilet for every thirty or so guests will be necessary, you might want to check the plumbing beforehand so as to avoid unpleasant accidents. Provide generators for powering the lights, the music, outdoor refrigerators, and other electricity-dependant equipment.

The weather is also an important factor in planning, as no matter the forecast, surprises are always possible. To protect your guests from both the sun and the rain, think about renting a quick-assembly tent or canopies, umbrellas, and parasols. Depending on the time of the year, try and include fans or outdoor heaters and blankets, especially if you’re planning to party far into the night.

Get personal

Probably one of the biggest advantages of having a wedding at home is the ability to decide on the decorations in detail. Once you’ve picked a theme, you can start your search for decorations and other objects to give a personal touch to the setting.

For example, trees can be used to hang banners, string lights, lanterns or glass jars with candles. Walls can be painted or, even better, covered with amazing outdoor wall art which is more durable, more weather-resistant, and easier to apply. The best thing is, it can grace your walls for many years to come.

Rustic-style wooden tables are a great choice if you don’t want to worry about dirtying the linens. Use tree stumps to place all the extra lightning, food or tableware that otherwise wouldn’t fit on the tables. And, to make it easier for your guests, you can put up signposts to point them in the direction of the amenities.

Reconsider your options

Making full use of the setting will require some well-thought-out planning. On one hand, you will want to include all that is necessary to accommodate your guests, store the food and drinks and provide maximum comfort. On the other hand, you will also want to avoid the space getting overcrowded and people being unable to move freely.

If your space allows it, having a bar would be a great idea, and if you’re keen on preparing the food by yourself, you can also include grills and roasters, or even a small outdoor kitchen. Otherwise, you will have to rely on caterers, in which case you’ll need to carefully plan the timing – you don’t want your wedding cake and other desserts to melt into a puddle of goo in the heat.

Enjoy the benefits

Organising a backyard wedding can be demanding, but it’s also very rewarding. In addition to the intimate, relaxed feel, it will also give you the opportunity to get exactly what you want at a relatively small expense. From chairs and tables to grills, tableware and decorations, you can use what you have, and what you don’t, you can always borrow or rent. Food can be prepared at home or catered, and if you don’t want to hire staff, you can ask your family and friends for help.

Finally, and I’m sure you’ll agree, there’s no better way to start a life together than bonding over organising your own wedding with a joint effort.

10 Telltale Signs Your Man Is Cheating On You

Cheating is a choice, not a mistake.

In one of my previous articles here in Singles and Married, I talked about infidelity myths and mentioned some underlying issues which can be motives for cheating. I also elaborated on how disloyal partners a.k.a cheaters aren’t all the same. Some cheat physically, others cheat emotionally; some folks don’t know what they’re doing, others are just plain egocentric jerks.

Let me share you a true story: a month ago, I just discovered that my boyfriend of four and a half years cheated on me with a co-worker he has known for nine months. Based on the pictures I saw and the drastic decline of affection I felt, I assume they’ve been dating for five months while we’re still in a relationship. He did apologize but he never asked for another shot, so I guess I know what he chose, or rather, WHO he chose.

Now that I have experienced an infidelity story first-hand, I can say that the article I wrote last January has more depth and meaning than ever. I couldn’t sleep for a couple of days, questioning myself what went wrong and what was wrong with me. Am I not enough? Am I unattractive? Then why did he do it? Then I recalled that even seemingly perfect relationships are susceptible to infidelity.

This time, I’ll share 10 common signs your partner might be cheating, based not only on my personal experience for the past months but also on the experiences of women who had fallen for the wrong guys in the past.

1. He suddenly becomes concerned with his appearance

You tell him countless times to eat his veggies and head to the gym but did he ever listen? No. However, these past few weeks or months, you notice that he transformed into a fitness-conscious person, not in a “do it for your health” way but in a “do it for your 6-pack abs” way.

Another sign is when he’s getting a little extra with his clothing. He never dresses up his fancy attire when you go out on dates to impress you. Well, he used to when your love was new. But lately, you see him looking his best when he goes out with “the boys” or leaves for work. He changes his perfume. He shaves and cuts his hair too, which are unusual.

2. He spends a lot of time at work

It’s unusual because you’ve known him as the person heads home the second the clock strikes 5. He’s been extra busy lately and is working overtime – even strange hours. He spends extra hours with co-workers and volunteers to travel out of town on assignments.

3. He always talks about this new “friend”

And he seems very enthusiastic when he does.

Work affairs are very common, considering how much time we spend working together in one room or building. He might mention a “friend” to dispel any suspicions. He might even ask you to meet her in person because they “talk about you a lot.” He assures you that this “coworker” is just a friend and he’s just helping her to get over her past relationship or to improve at work.

4. He’s on his phone all the time

And he quickly turns it off when you enter the room.

We know privacy is important, but the way he hides his phone from you seems suspicious. He often sets it to airplane mode. He never even shows you pictures or videos on his own phone. Suddenly, there’s a password.

If you have to use it for whatever reason like if you have to call someone, it hard for him to lend it. He says he’s finishing a game but the truth is he’s talking to someone.  He glances at his phone first before giving it to you.

5. You keep finding weird things

You find a lipstick he claims that belongs to her sister, a lady’s undergarment which, he claims, got mixed in from his mom’s laundry, and hickeys on his neck he claims are insect bites.

6. His sex drive is totally different

There are two sides of the story. Firstly, perhaps he’s getting attention from another woman that he’s no longer interested in sleeping with you. Secondly, maybe he wants to have sex with you more since his “other woman” is giving him sex drive boost.

7. He gets mad whenever you question him

Simple questions like “where are you going tonight” or “what did you eat for dinner” feel more like a series of interrogations for him. He gets really mad and defensive and even accuses you of being distrustful (when in reality, you have the reason to be).

8. He even accuses you of cheating

He accuses you of seeing other men when you’re at work, or of texting your ex even if you’re not doing anything. He prohibits you from partying or going home late because you might see other men. He’s projecting his own guilt onto you, and he’s assuming you’re being as disloyal as he is.

9. He shows no sign of interest in you

Remember when he used to say how amazing you look in your black dress? How your red lipstick suited you? Or even how pretty you are even when you’re not wearing any makeup?

Well, that was yesterday. Today’s a different story.

Even if you exerted some efforts to look your best, he shows no interest in you. He never even notices you changed your hairstyle.

10. He indirectly pushes you away

Whenever you’re nice to him, he says he’s not good enough, and that you deserve someone better. He even asks you, “are you still happy with me?” These are some of the signs he’s slowly letting you go. He doesn’t even have the guts to tell straight to your face that he wants to break up with you.

Author Bio: Carmina Natividad is one of the writers for The Relationship Room, a couples psychology institution specializing in relationship counseling and therapies for couples and families. When she’s not using her pen in writing self-help articles focused on love, dating, and relationships, she spends her time creating poems and screenplays, painting,

first date at the beach

How to Dress for Your First Date at the Beach

There is something inherently romantic about beach dates. You can feel the sand between your toes, almost taste the salt in your mouth, and the gentle breeze is definitely doing your hair a favour by making it seem like you’re on a movie set. However, picking out the perfect outfit for a beach date makes this experience less pleasant. You can’t go with the usual classics such as the little black dress or spice up a casual jeans combination with your favourite stilettos. Don’t ruin your beauty sleep over this; here are a few tips that will make your style just as beautiful as your hair fluttering in the wind.

Is it sun-and-fun or sunset and romance?

First of all, you need to separate these two very different beach dates. If you are going to the beach in the middle of the day, when everyone, including you, will swim, sunbathe or play sand volleyball, you can get by in your usual swimsuit and some accessories. However, if we are talking about a romantic evening at the beach, and perhaps even a picnic with wine (you’re so lucky), you should up the game a little bit. And the following few tips are all about upping the game.

Jeans and all that goes with them

Take out your favourite pair of jeans shorts from your closet, and rock it with your bikini top. This is an especially great choice for an active day on the beach. If you are planning on wearing shorts in the evening, spice up the combination with a cover-up top (think something light and dreamy like a crochet piece), multiple bracelets, a floppy sun hat and a casual tote bag.

When you think about it, it’s all about a stylish cover-up

Although they’re mentioned earlier, they didn’t get the attention they deserve. Cover-ups are the 101 of beach dates, because they can make the transition from an ordinary day on the beach to a hot date seamless. The same goes for the transition between a romantic walk and a “let’s go night swimming” decision. Plus, they can make you look different on the beach each day, even if you are wearing the same swimsuit. The most stylish among cover-ups are, of course, kaftans. As the summer is approaching, kaftans in the UK are making a huge comeback, so it is time to equip yourself with a few.

Maximize your style

You know what we are talking about? There is nothing more whimsical than a lady walking along the white stretches of sand in a light maxi dress. This outfit is made for you particularly if you are a fan of the bohemian style. Even though it doesn’t require any further styling efforts, you can finish up your look with various details, such as bracelets, necklaces, rings, hats, hair jewelry (why not, even a flower band), bags, etc.

Beach elegance

Maybe your beach date is unlike any situation mentioned above. Maybe you will have a real deal romantic dinner with wine, music and flowers. In that case, it is only natural to dress up more than in the previous cases. You need to find the balance between dressy and comfortable, though. High heels and cocktail dresses are out of the question, of course. There are several combinations you can choose from according to your sensibility. You can wear non-jeans shorts and a transparent blouse (which can have laced sleeves for the extra ‘wow’ effect). Another option is a mini or midi dress made of lightweight material. Consider breathable fabrics like linen, lace, rayon and silk.

Finally, your outfit is not the only thing you should think about. When it comes to makeup, you should go with a natural look, without aggressive details like eyeliner and lipstick. Now go have fun on your date!

1 2 3 23